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Po’ Shines

The internet is generally where shy people hang out, and pretend that they’re functional and confident and attractive. new balance 574 And sometimes exchange money orders and photos of their genitalia. adidas pas cher But the best part of the internet is making friends that you would never have met otherwise. Functional, confident, attractive friends. Like Dawn and her movie club. ugg prix france Or me and my sensual masseuse from Craigslist. Or ALL STAR sosovelo witty commenter Sixty, who introduced me to perhaps the greatest secret food establishment in all of Portland, Po’ Shines in Kenton. I made it clear at one point that I’m in a long term committed relationship with my favorite breakfast restaurant ever, Arleta Library Cafe. But I’ve been straying a bit lately with Po’ Shines. Po’ Shines is amazing. First of all, they use the apostrophe as a mark of elision rather than possession. Which is awes’m! And they make maybe the best food ever. And then they sell it to you really cheap. These are my criteria for a perfect restaurant: Cheap. Delicious. Elision punctuation.

8139 N. Denver Portland, OR 97217 503.978.9000 poshines@gmail.com

The menu at Po’Shines includes a blackened catfish breakfast burrito that’s as big as the Tiniest Sprinter. The chef does some kind of crazy magic to it so that the cheese and egg are all part of the tortilla, and then they fill the rest with grilled vegetables and the meat of your choice. And you know what they don’t do? They don’t waste all that space with potatoes. Because fuck potatoes on a breakfast burrito. Nothing says cheap and lazy like a breakfast burrito full of potatoes. Except maybe a breakfast burrito full of One Whole Chicken in a Can. Especially if it’s still in the can. poshines The staff are unbelievably friendly, and will happily walk you through any indecision. The last time I went there, I was standing outside with friends after breakfast, and they brought us little cups of a smoothie they had made. Outside. After we had already left. And last night they cheered for me on the way home from PIR. I’d avoided Po’ Shines in the past because it looked like one of those places that you think might serve food but mostly just serves coffee, but you won’t know until you walk in and look at the menu. And if you do walk in and they don’t have food, you’ll just have to walk back out and everyone will look at you and think “What, did he think he was too good for this place?!” and so you have to walk back in and say “It wasn’t you, it’s ME! I thought you had more food…” and then they’ll get defensive and say “We’ve got bagels” It’s not like that. It’s full of amazing food. You should go in. nike air zoom pegasus Because it will blow your mind. The only downside is the hours. Closed Sundays.